Off-Shoulder Sweatshirt, Flash Dance and How to Speak to Someone On His Level
WHAT:
Hola Amores! I am realizing lately that I have a slight fixation with the ’80s. What can I say? The music was just so electronic, the clothes so dramatic, the movies so cheesey! I remember watching Jennifer Beals in Flash Dance, feet taped up, leg-warmers hiked, sweaty curls flying as she danced around (or her her body double with the uber tight buns danced around) to “she’s a maniac/ maaaaaniac on the floor!” Well, today’s trend is an ’80s classic and is featured on the movies’ DVD cover: the off-the-shoulder sweatshirt.
Alloy $37
WHERE:
Now, as you know, I would usually show six different versions of featured trend in this section, all under the price point of $200. Alas, an off-the-shoulder sweatshirt doesn’t have many permutations, so instead, I’ve looked up instructions on how you can transform that old high school track sweatshirt into a cute vintage lounge top from the comfort of your own home.
1. Lay the sweatshirt flat on a table.
2. Use sharp scissors to snip a small hole 2″ inside the shoulder seams on each side.
3. Stick the scissors through the hole cutting only ONE layer at a time (the top layer first), and cut straight across (not in a “U” shape) to the hole on the other side.
4. Now cut the bottom layer, following the line you’ve already cut. Voila! Flash Dance fab!
HOW:
I mean, really–is there any “proper way” to sport lounge wear? Throw your sweatshirt on with some jeans or with a pair of tights. NOTE: Ladies, please make sure your tights are not see through on a sunny day if you’re going to have your butt out. I’ve been seeing a lot of this on the streets lately and it ain’t pretty! Otherwise, make sure your sweatshirt is long enough to cover that tush!
EASY-LIVING TIP:
The root of effective communication does not lie in flowery language or oratorical acrobatics. The best communicators of our time knew how to speak to others on their own level. Does this sound condescending? It shouldn’t. After all, mimicry is the greatest form of flattery. Use these steps to improve your communication skills and watch new relationships, both professional and personal, crop up in your wake:
1. Listen and digest. The first step to speaking to someone on his own level is listening to how he speaks. Does he use common diction? Slang? Big words? Does he speak slowly and deliberately? Or does he talk at lightening speed? Consider all of these hints as cues for your own behavior.
2. Be at the same eye level. This simply means that if the person you’re speaking to is sitting down, you should take a seat, too. Standing above him can seem condescending, and sitting below him, submissive or insecure.
3. Now, mimic him. What do I mean by “mimic?’ Simply that you should keep with his pace and stay within his sphere of oratorical complexity. If you don’t use slang, don’t attempt to or you might offend. However, you should try to make the person feel at ease–that you are neither speaking up or talking down to him.
4. Keep it simple. Use the simplest language and the fewest number of words possible to get your point across. Unless you’re playing Scrabble, you’re not scoring any extra points for your knowledge of the dictionary.
5. Watch your tone and volume. Try not to speak extra loudly simply because someone is old (unless they indicate that you should do so), or use a condescending tone simply because someone has an accent. Watch for the cues before you make any judgments, and try to generally maintain an “inside volume” and a gentle, level tone so your meaning is not lost in your emphasis.
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Sheer Tops, “Cold Hearted Snakes” and the Fastest Way to Feel Better
WHAT:
Hey Divas! If you grew up with strict parents like I did, then you can relate when I say that music videos were quite possibly the only reason I didn’t end up a nun. Watching Madonna, Janet, and Paula Abdul gyrate and writhe all over my TV screen definitely taught me a little sumpin’ sumpin’ about being sexy. There is one Paula video in particular, “Cold-Hearted Snake”, that made me look over my shoulder, trigger-finger on the remote, ready to change the channel as soon as I heard parental footsteps approaching. The way those dance couples freaked each other in the audition, Paula at the head of the pack in her sheer black shirt with the bra underneath, singing about that asshole boyfriend whose been “t-tellin lies!”–it was enough to make a schoolgirl blush, that’s for sure!
Forever 21 $23
Well girls, if you watched the runways this fall, you know that the sheer top has made a fierce comeback. Whether it’s lace, mesh, or fishnet, a see-through shirt is boudoir chic when worn the right way. Shy girls needn’t worry–you can always throw a tank underneath if the exposed bra look is too much for you.
WHERE:
Bebe $39
Topshop $70
Bebe $39
Free People $48
bebe $79
Free People $38
HOW:
As I mentioned before, a black bra under a sheer black top is not the only way to go. You can tone down the sexiness with a black tank, or you can throw a blazer over the fit for a more conservative look. As far as bottoms, I love pairing sexy tops with more structured pieces like snug pencil skirts or a black cigarette pants. Finally, dare to wear a leather jacket on top for even more pizzazz.
EASY-LIVING TIP:
You have probably heard a hundred and one gimmicks all proven to make you feel better: stretch, exercise, breath deeply, meditate, stand on top of your head…the list goes on and on! And while many of these actions do, in fact, work (to a degree), the fastest most surefire way to feel better–right now, now matter how down you are, no matter how dire your circumstances seem–is to turn your attention outwards for a moment and…show appreciation to others.
That’s right. It’s that simple. It could be your boss, your best friend, you parents, or the guy who remembers your half-soy, half-skim latte each morning at Starbucks before you can even ask for it. When you take the time to recognize the goodness that others bring to your life, you will experience joy by way of spreading joy. There is nothing better than seeing someone’s face light up when you give him positive feedback or tell him you admire him. We’re all human, and we all seek constant approval from others.
So next time you’re down, go on–pick up the phone, call your parents, and shower them with compliments. Signal the maitre d’ over and tell him what a stupendous job that waiter did. You never know the great impact that a small gesture can have on the lives of others–and on your own happiness.
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